Introducing Mrs. Vieira

As Mr. Vieira wrote about last week, this blog is an idea to basically be another hobby of ours. I like to write very much and he likes to talk about stuff he enjoys doing, so we might as well join both in a single thing. We were a little hesitant at talking about personal matters but we figured we should just choose wisely what to say.

We both have had some turbulent past experiences that we grew from. He already wrote briefly about his experiences and now I feel like it is my turn to do the same.

I have incredibly low self esteem and a huge lack of confidence in myself. I have always been a little fat, somewhat chubby and that made me feel undesirable since my teenage years. I was bullied when I was around 13 years old. That is a very delicate age, so many things are happening inside our minds and body. I still feel the consequences from that sometimes. This huge gap in my esteem spreads to my confidence in other areas for some infuriating unknown reason when I let my barriers down.

At the same time, I learned to show a tough front to the world, so in some ways this pretending helped me internalize some things. I consciously know I am smart and worthy of good fortune. I have learned to build up walls around my inner self so nobody can hurt me anymore. To the exterior world, I do look like a very self confident person. My husband, I believe, is the only person that I truly allow to take a peek inside. This exchange between us has helped to solve some of our issues.

If you are reading this and you feel like you connect to anything I have said, or if you need to remember yourself that things will turn out alright someday, relax. Just give yourself a break from overthinking too much. I think low self esteem is just like an addiction when it is up to the “cure”. There is no cure. Some comment here, some situation there and you will be down the hill once again. Unless you surround yourself with people that love you for who you are. Or, in my case, unless you find a person that knows all of your weaknesses and still loves you.

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Mrs. Vieira

Introducing Mr. Vieira

As my first post, I decided to write about the blog and myself. First, Every Otter Thing was a long idea about a blog in which my wife and I could write about everything, every single piece of advice, mistakes, and achievements in our lives.

I am from Brazil, but at age of 18 I moved to the USA. It was nice to know another country, but I got a big problem: I’m terrible at speaking (even my native language). Can you guess how my English is? Well, not great. I can say how many times it made my life terrible, hard and annoying. I do not have a lot of friends. I do not have a good relationship with anybody (until I met my wife). Also, I have some nice abilities. I get stressed very easily, I loose focus/interest quickly, and many more. AKA It makes my life terrible.

For many years I thought I was cursed. I would question out loud: Why always me? I even did not talk about my terrible family, after long years of ignoring me and saying I was being “girly”. I could not be more depressed?. I got at a lot of bad relationships too. Because I wanted to hide my feelings and depression. Well, I got a rough teenager/young adult years for lack of support.

Well, It was hell. How can you fight against something this dangerous? With Patience. After long years thinking about all the bad stuff on live. I learned I wasn’t cursed. I was someone lost at the world, I needed to find my way. Doesn’t matter if I was alone, if I could find my way, I would be fine. One day I heard a phase: “Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, It’s not the end.” Since then, it become my phase of life.

 I not too old, but I had to make a lot of difficult decisions: College or my current wife, Brazil or USA, New Car or live alone. But anyway, everybody has difficult decisions to make, it does not matter if you are old or new. Every time you fail, you should learn with it. Do not think you are worthless. Keep going. You will find friends, people how loves you what you are, experiences which will make history for your children. All of that. Just keep walking. Never give up.

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Mr. Vieira